Paper Street

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I’m tired of all this social crap of defining what everyone “should” be. We can be told theoretically how to be a good person, but just by practicing these rules, does that genuinely make someone an actual good person?

Actually it seems people are MORE caught up about their “theoretical” goodness than practicality. Sounds similar to the idea of “book smarts” vs. “street smarts”.

Anyways, I say this because I’m sick of trying to be a “good” boyfriend in theory. All this crap at “what to do when you like a girl”, like steps to take starting with “1) ask her out”… etc. etc. blah blah…. is driving me insane. It’s making me base my actions on a list of stupid procedure, instead of doing things from impulse and emotion. Actually that sounds bad in terms of like a business standpoint, but doing business is very opposite than doing things from love. When it comes to love, impulse and emotion is what defines you, not the petty “procedure”.

Do what you want. If you’re in love, and you two know it, do what you want. Don’t be afraid to be judged upon doing what the girl or guy is “supposed” to do, because a textbook can’t show you how to love. So why follow the textbook in the first place?

If anyone’s seen the French movie “A Very Long Engagement”, you’ll notice how they were both deathly in love. And the guy seemed so fruity, but did that matter? No, because he did everything out of love, and didn’t care what ’society’ thinks or says. And neither should we.

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What’s the deal with PDA (public displays of affection)? In a relationship, I think it’s important that the two are close together, and have a special bond… but this however doesn’t mean they should just stand in the middle of a public place and think they are the only people in this world and make out furiously.

Ok, to an extent, it’s reasonable to share affection and do things that are “cute” or “romantic” even if it’s in a relationship’s ‘own world’. (Often times, guys may not see the “cute”ness of these situations whereas girls do, but I’m not saying that’s giving me a bias to this article). But even with the understanding of relationships naturally aww-ing the public in cases, ultimately, “making out” does NOT qualify as cute or romantic. Seriously. Not even to the ditzy girls who would find anything aww-ing.

Now on the other hand, if we actually get into the situation and understand more than the plain “making out” aspect, such as: a guy and girl meet each other from afar, and haven’t seen each other in such a long time that they run up to each other and kiss, while holding each other in their arms for hours and hours and just stand there together… yes that is a public display of their affection, but it qualifies as being “romantic” or “cute”. Even I, as an angry guy especially on this subject of pda, agree that it qualifies as being aww-worthy. But if these two just walk up to each other after seeing the other just a few hours or minutes ago, and just start orally attacking each other… well does that really seem romantic to you?

The expression “get a room” isn’t merely a simple joke to “hahaha you’re so hilarious!” to. It actually means more than the some how ‘funny’ aspect of them getting down privately in a room. That “get a room” phrase implies that we (as the public) really don’t give a crap how much you two are in love; share your affection within the two of you, not in public. It’s not saying don’t make out, because that would be just plain selfish on the public’s part. It’s saying you can share your connection together, just not here where it makes others furiously disgusted.

On a side (but somewhat related) note, here’s what couples really shouldn’t do:
- don’t patronise others just because you’re in a relationship and they’re not
(do you think because in your mind you put yourself as superior, no one else would think the opposite?)
- don’t detach your friends just because they’re not directly within your relationship’s “world”
(a relationship should be a compliment, not a replacement of other friendships)
- and finally, don’t forget that there are others around you when you decide to publicly display your affection.
- Ultimately, don’t let a relationship cloud your mind.